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My Journal - An Unexpected Shift

Dear Diary,

So this is an entry that I wasn't quite expecting to make, one that I feel so happy to share and one that is spoken from my most honest heart. Create Love Heal is my baby and when I started this I wasn't sure exactly where I wanted it to go. But I think I just figured it out.....

One thing is certain - time passes with or without us. The only way to stop time is to capture that precious moment in a photograph. And upon reviewing, when that insanely special buzzing in your heart occurs; creating nostalgia and instantly taking you back to that moment - there is silence, peace, happiness, sadness and a sense of elevation. A moment of meditation and purity. A moment in life where you can relive the past through emotions. What a priceless thing we have. To be able to recapture a feeling of joy or peace, a moment of sadness or gratitude is quite possibly the most incredible gift next to experiencing the moment first hand.

Sometimes I feel like I'm missing my own life. Missing my kids every new facial expression, every little gesture, every minute yet significant milestone. I feel distracted, I feel lost and I feel spiritually removed.
And so time is passing me by without my full attention. I am busy trying to keep up with the Jones, trying to give what I love but also trying to capture and deliver what people want to see. I realise in this very moment that I am sacrificing my true and authentic journey to satisfy the criteria of a community I so deeply respect and love but have never truly felt enough for.

I believe your soul is your true set of eyes, the glimpse into our happiness that often we ignore of forget to connect with. Our soul allows us to explore all of our senses, our desires, our wants and needs, our deepest secrets and regrets without an ounce of judgment. It is pure and it knows us better than we sometimes egotistically know ourselves. It is the key to our true and authentic self. We allow society to categories what is acceptable and what is unacceptable formulating a censored version of ourselves to fit the criteria. In this process we begin to judge ourselves based on another set of criteria. Is it ok to love comic books and want to dress in gothic clothing…well only if you want to be looked at and excluded by modern day society. Is it ok to be fascinated with make up and want to tell people about it…apparently so. Who decides this and why do we listen?

So I am tuning into my soul and listening for the first time in a while. Because I became distracted by a community of people who are so lovely and so welcoming that I felt I needed to be the same, and in reality I share a passion with them but I also have so much more to offer.

And so here I go....on a slightly modified, yet more authentically driven path. A spiritually connected, more present & genuinely happy direction. One that will service my personal growth beyond where I am idling now. Recent events have caused deep reflection and re-evaluation for me. Something I have been pushing aside for some time. Now it is here, unavoidably in my face and it feels incredible to be faced with my authentic self staring back at me, blankly urging me to be this person.
The imperfect, blemished, mess of a human that I am. That perfect version of myself. I love that person, I love the quirk, the bizarre sense of humour, the perfectionist, the over-thinker and analyser. The one who finally owns herself...all of herself. That is me.

And so this is what you'll see....
My ongoing love for non-toxic beauty, my passion for fitness, mother nature, the universes messages, signs, healing, passionate and healthy cooking with copious amounts of chocolate and finally my writing and thoughts.

This is the ever-searching, nostalgic, sometimes overly precious but witty Brigid. The one who loves so deeply that my heart hurts, the one who wants deep connections and to drop the small talk. The one who stares at the ocean as though my creativity is birthed there. The one who desires connections with past lives and wants to know my future before it happens so I can immerse myself in every moment & truly love it, knowing everything will be ok.

This, right here is me.
You can love me or you can leave me; either way I will probably over-feel it, analyse it and give you love anyway.
So here is to a slightly shifted focus.
One of peace, happiness and filled with multiple passions...because that is me.
I want to share that with you and empower others to embrace, love and infinitely accept themselves.
Because there really is only one of each of us...everyone else is taken. So as my imprinted tattoo says....Be You.

B xx

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